Why doesn't my boyfriend kiss me
Aaaalso, first of all thank you all for the answers!
First of all, I think it's surprising how many are not-so-the-smooches here - I never would have thought that this would be so common, in my perception the distribution would be completely different. Somehow it calms me down in a way. Though of course that's silly.
Then - that with the pumpkin answer - I didn't get that upset that much, maybe I just misrepresented it - I just didn't address the problem in the sense of, “You, I want something with you discuss what bothers me ”, but somehow asked in a childish pout why he doesn't want to kiss me, and he can't take that, then came the dry answer. After that, we continued to talk more seriously, but as I said, he didn't know much more to say, except that he just doesn't like doing it.
But you are right, I will address it again at some point in peace (= not whimpering or reproachful). (And also add concern about bad breath in any case. ) But…
Then: The whole post sounds like there is more in your relationship than just kissing or not kissing.
You read that out, yes? A lot is actually very complicated, actually the kissing thing is just the icing on the cake. I think the core problem is actually that I'm generally very unsure about how he will mediate and meet my needs - he quickly feels constricted and I actually tend to be more relaxed and have very fixed expectations of him or to have certain situations. The result, however, is that I no longer really know which of my claims are “legitimate” and which I can or want to defer because it is worth it to me.
We have already separated from the situation and in retrospect I made massive reproaches for myself because, in retrospect, I simply clung too much and had too fixed claims and too little self-confidence. And we started from scratch on a "pressure-free" basis, and are now back together as if firmly (with a lot of the unspoken, because I don't want to scare it away, ("fear of attachment"), but with significant progress actually) and ... yes. I do not know either.
(Do me a favor and don't say that such a relationship would be too exhausting for you. I know. It is me too. But then it's wonderful again and he's such a strange, great guy - the bottom line is it makes up for it all . Mostly. I think so. Argh.)
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